On Mediocrity 1 (Belated Marathon)

Everyone knows that the New York City Marathon is, like, the major running event of the year. People pay thousands of dollars to stand, freezing, in Staten Island with hangover-esque jet lag in order to run their worst time in a race distance that is, with the proliferation of performance-enhancing drugs and ultramarathons, increasingly less…

Cruelty Analysis in the First Degree

  When I was a little girl, or at least a less old adult, I decided to start a blog. I just fact checked the exact dates of the blog beginning, and it was July of 2010. Assumedly, a birthday had just passed (the 24th) and I was feeling, as the kids say, a certain…

New Year, New You

Once upon a time, there was a year from hell. Some people made memes about it, some people chose to block it from their memory through excessive ingestion of substances and online television, and still other people honored it by creating this magical trailer. Whatever your coping mechanism, 2016, like food poisoning and shitty relationships, ran its…

Marathon Musings: Staten Island State of Mind

A lot of people say that running the New York City Marathon was the best experience of their life. I hope this is true, because it would be really awesome to wake up tomorrow and have the best thing that has ever happened to me happen to me. However, I doubt that this will be…

The Final Countdown: Marathon Special

Ladies and Gentlemen, the countdown has begun! The TCS New York City Marathon, a.k.a. the reason I have forsaken all friends and fun for a large part of the summer and now fall, is officially one month from today. I ran a 20-mile run last week, which means that I’ll probably finish the race. It’s…

It’s Not A Sprint: Part Two

But fine. You’ve accepted the facts, you know it’s going to be hard, you’ve run your 5ks and 10ks, and maybe even a half or two. You take a break from training, smoke a few cigarettes, stay out later than you should, and then there you are: 20 weeks away from the ultimate adult extracurricular activity, The…

It’s Not A Sprint: Part One

I mentioned in my post about attending graduation that the older we get, the fewer Big Life Events we have to look forward to. As we run out of milestones, or at least drift farther away from them, we need to establish new goals to punctuate our directionless floating in the morass known as life. Enter…

Counting Stars Radio, by Pandora

on ice: on the fact that you can find fiber installations                                                                                        …

Snow Fuck Yourself

One of the things I try to do when writing, and living, is to remain rational when I’m livid. If I’m going on an extended rant, I aim to back it up with evidence and reasons for my discontent. This is not to say that I’m zen by any account – on the contrary, every…

Raise the Roof

Last night, I walked up Broadway long after midnight. Fluffy snow was beginning to fall, and as I looked West at the Palisades glowing in the snow dance moonlight, I could already foresee the catastrophic commute that’s currently permitting me time to write this post. The malls running through the center of the thoroughfare were…

Fuck the Brooklyn Half

On January 22nd, registration opened up for the New York Road Runner’s Brooklyn Half Marathon. For club members, registration was $55; non-members had to pay $75. Less than 48 hours later, on January 24th, the race was completely full save for charity spots, which allow you race entry provided you can raise a certain amount…

You Don’t Sit

Imagine the scene: Chambers Street, platform of the uptown 2/3 express. My legs are trembling after a double, my quads sore from my early morning pre-double jog. It’s late, the train isn’t bustling, and I can see the lights of the train coming north in the tunnel. Sweet seat sanctity, I think to myself. I…